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i’ve been drowning myself in work lately. no not school work, thank goodness i finished the semester a couple days ago. but actual work, that pays me money. it was a goal that i gave myself, to spend the summer working so i can have enough money to pay for tuition my junior year of college, which starts back up in august. but honestly, i think that work is an escape from home, and just being there. i just think i need my space right now, my mom has been making me feel like crap lately so i enjoy working just to avoid her. not being at home. i just need space to breathe, and being at work, well i guess you could say that’s my medicine because i am at a place away from my family, doing work that keeps me physically active so i have something to focus on, while making money at the same time. yes it’s tiring, and when i come home all i want to do is sleep but i’ll take it over being at home.

but yeah, that’s where my head is at right now. this week was incredibly stressful because i had finals and projects. now i’m just trying to come back from that. thanks for reading, as always.

paper airplanes

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class is cancelled

Hey guys!

Long time no talk, aah life has just been super busy lately. I say that, but I’ve also been watching a lot of Netflix, but you know, have to balance out the work life with the personal one I guess. Today I got up super early because since my mom has been using my car, I have to use hers (long story) sooo I’ve had to park on the street since my moms car doesn’t have a SEU permit. And I was like “OKAY don’t wanna be late today so I will get up earlier than usual with plenty of time to park and walk to my class” SO I did, I arrived like 30 minutes early to school, and got to my classroom early. No one was there but since I was early I just thought no one had gotten here yet no big deal, but just in case I checked my email and, drum roll please…class was cancelled! I was like what…..wait what.

I could go on, but long story short, I ended up just heading to the library and getting some work done that I had been procrastinating on. So I actually did something with my time, yay! But yeah, I want to blog more and be more active on paper airplanes Instagram, I’ve just been doing school work, and well regular work. So yeah, but I am working on being more active on here.

Anyways thanks for reading, I’m going to head over to my last class of the day, or should I say first class since my other one was cancelled, then off to work, so it should be a pretty good day. I feel good right now, hopefully I keep feeling this way until the end of the day, have a great weekend..or week depending on when you’re reading this!

paper airplanes

thoughts on big brother, james maslow & bullying

okay okay so i love love love this show called Big Brother that premieres on CBS, it’s about these group of people from all different sorts of backgrounds living under the same roof for months and competing for thousands and thousands of dollars for months. long story short, people get evicted every week until there are only 2 people remaining.

SO now that you get the gist of it, recently they premiered Celebrity Big Brother, where celebrities from all different kinds of backgrounds play the game. one of them being, my favorite, James Maslow, if you’re a millennial like me you may remember him from nickelodeons Big Time Rush. that’s where i knew him from, and well i’ve been rooting for him to win the game, and been watching every episode. while watching the series you get to see how these people interact with others and play certain games. well James is a competition beast! and he is so friendly and nice and did i mention he is also really handsome.

NOW on to the bullying part of this post. playing the game was also this real housewives of Beverly hills person called Brandi. and for some reason she did not like james at all, from day 1 she just strated picking on him, calling him names, trying to downgrade him. and it just got me upset, because she is a full grown adult and is picking on someone that is half her age, James is 27. it’s just so rude and mean to pick on someone just because you don’t like them. don’t get me wrong this type of thing happens all the time when people play big brother and are on the show, but these are celebrities that have a platform and have fans watching them and we look up to them.

but the way james handled the whole situation was amazing. every time she would say something mean to him he would either not say anything at all or question why she was saying that. he was just such a gentlemen and never picked on her, or called her names or anything because that’s just the type of person that he is. that made me love him, and made me happy that i was rooting for him, because he was not stooping down to her level, and knowing that he has fans that are watching him, he was setting such a good example as to how we should handle bullies. as someone who has been bullied before, it is so nice to see someone with a platform be so kind, and show positivness all around even when they are getting picked on

unfortunately james also got evicted after brandi which means that he is no longer playing the game, which just made me so sad.

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i was rooting for him to win, and he deserved to go all the way!! but i feel that he has gained even more fans, and i am definitely supporting him through his music and movies so even thought he didn’t win big brother he won his fans’ heart ❤

WE LOVE YOU JAMES

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paper airplanes

it get’s overwhelming

at times.

when i have so much to do, i just panic and don’t do any of it.

i feel that i can’t do it, so i don’t and just look the other way.

i tune everything out and sit back and watch netflix, to see other people’s problems instead of facing my own.

but today was different, my therapist told me to acknowledge whenever i do that and just say “yes, i have a lot of work to do, yes it is overwhelming but i will do it”

to just look that fear in the eye and do it.

so that is what i am doing, that is what i will do. i will knock all of the projects and homework that i have to do one by one. yes i have a lot do and i WILL do it.

paper airplanes

OWN. YOUR. LIFE. — The Godly Chic Diaries

this is honestly how this semester has gone. and it sums up everything that i have experienced, thought i would share with you guys.

I lied and said I was busy. I was busy but not in a way most people understand. I was busy taking deeper breaths. I was busy silencing irrational thoughts. I was busy calming a racing heart. I was busy telling myself I am okay. Sometimes this is my busy and I will not apologise […]

via OWN. YOUR. LIFE. — The Godly Chic Diaries

thanksgiving break is finally here

hello! that seems so formal, hey! wait….hi!, there we go (i think).

how was everyone been doing? i’m going to try to keep this short and sweet. thanksgiving break is finally here, and i am over the moon happy. i don’t really like that SEU makes us have to come to school monday and tuesday, but it’s alright. i’ve been needing a brake for quite some time now and it’s finally here. i’m going to use this time to catch up on work, get things in order, and well, prepare for finals. i had the option to work, like all break, man that would be a nice amount of money that i could definitely use but i talked to my therapist (i’ve been seeing a therapist, but that’s a blog post for another day 😉 ). i asked her what to do, as i need the money, but i also have tons of work and studying to do. she pretty much told me i can either be lenient and make exceptions with my schedule and take the shifts, or i can set boundaries and say no. long story short i thought about it and i said no. i’m going to take this break to catch up on homework and just focus on myself, WHILE squeezing some turkey and pies in there, haha.

so yeah i’m happy, how are you guys spending your thanksgiving? would love to hear about it! thanks for reading!

paper airplanes

you don’t have life figured out either so don’t bash me on mine

okay so i don’t like it when other people judge you based on what they think they know about you. first of all you may know nothing about a person or what they’re going through so judging them and letting them know that you’re judging them, it’s like no stop.

let’s backtrack, i’m a procrastinator, but i’m trying to get a hold of things and i genuinely feel like i’m making progress. i managed to turn my grade in a visual arts class from a 35% to a 95%. and i’m super proud of that, a negative D to an A? i did that! and i took this online math quiz and got a 90%! that’s the highest i’ve gotten on a math quiz before, and i’m super proud of myself. like i’m doing good, though there are still a couple of things that i need to do and get turned it, but i will find the time for those. anyways so back to what this post is really about..

the other day we had to turn in an assignment in my art class and well i didn’t have it because i was too busy making a 90 on the math quiz so i didn’t have anything to turn in, but it wasn’t the end of the world, i mean i was okay nothing bad happened i just didn’t have anything to present.  and one of my classmates who i also talk to on the regular noticed, we will call him boxi. boxi was like do you have anything and i was like nope. that wasn’t a big deal BUT later that day boxi was like “so do you have anything for that class? like aren’t you worried about your grade? you have A LOT of stuff to do how do you intend on getting all of it done in time?”

in my head i was just like okay first of all weather i get it in in time or not is not any of your business like will it affect you in any way? i don’t think so! just the way boxi was talking to me with this sort of i feel bad for you, what are you doing type of attitude. Boxi i think you’re pretty amazing and are starting to become a nice good friend but you don’t know what i am going through, or what is happening in my life right now so don’t judge me because you may think you have your life figured out, you know always getting everything in in time and what not, but i guarantee you things aren’t going to stay that way forever. you may have your opinions about me and thats A Oh-Kay but don’t tell me that i am doing something wrong with my studies, or what am i doing with a judge-y attitude please.

alrighty guys this was more of a rant, but i just needed to get that off my chest. IN OTHER NEWS i am planning a trip for winter brake which i am super excited about because it is going to be my first time going out of state and it’s going to be a pretty big deal for me! more details on that as we get closer, okay thanks for reading, bye!

pa